Edit on "A hair in the donut" - a look behind the props

I gave my last entry here some more thought, because somehow there still was more to it than the fact that people would throw away a whole and basically well-made and delicious donut after, well, okay, encountering something that was not edible, but which was a totally small fraction that did not do any harm per se and did not spoil the donut itself - instead of dealing with the situation in a more relaxed and constructive way.

My late grandma would have been furious with anyone who had thrown away the donut if something like the described thing had happened. She lived through the Second World War and knew what hunger was etc. etc.

But ... this is not what lies in a deeper layer of that train of thoughts that started in me yesterday morning. And yet, I had to detect and discover that myself. Happened when I brushed my teeth this morning. And has nothing whatsoever to do with dental hygiene. But I tend to get good ideas from out of the blue once in a while - while brushing my teeth.

So ... what popped to mind was that ...

If you see the donut incident in a more symbolical way, if you step a little further on / away, you can see it as a picture for how you see people.

What, if you like someone, if being together with him and being close to him does you good, if you have a picture of him that really goes well for you and feels good ... and then, all of a sudden and out of the blue, you discover something else there that does not fit into the pattern, that is something you somehow can't cope with - something that, in your eyes and perception, is "not part of" the being that you like or love?

The other one being the donut; the being together being represented by the eating (only as a symbol, and NOT in views and means of Hannibal Lecter, ta ta ...); and the unknown factor being represented by the hair - so much for the symbols.

So you discover something in the other person you can not get on board with. Definitely not. The rest of the person, you know how to deal with and love to do so, but this portion there is basically "inedible" for you.

Does such a thing, such a detail in a person's personality that you are not able to relate to, make the other one all of a sudden "inedible swill"? Are you not able any more to see the good that is he, that you like and love? The vast majority that is he?

I have friends who are fanatic sports fans. Soccer and all. Something that does absolutely NOTHING for me. But we get along very well, we're having fun and also good and intense conversations - sometimes even including soccer.

I have friends who are strongly rooted in Christian belief. I myself have a more freer view of things, finding good things in all religions I deal with. But we get along, exchanging ideas and spending fun time with each other.

...

Let's cut to the chase with that, shall we?

I was "a donut" to my parents. With all the above described attributes and dear relationship. Well, and some day, there turned out to be kind of "a hair" in that donut. Something that did not fit the picture. I was gay.

My parents had some hard time at first. But they made an effort to deal with it. They couldn't accept it at first. But: They tried and succeeded to make terms with the change of the situation, because they realized that this one point where I went into a different direction than the one they had, well, anticipated, didn't change what I was to them and to others in general. They made an effort to accept that, and they succeeded to do so.

I had not become something "inedible", a persona non grata, a "you're no son of mine any longer".

They didn't throw me away. And I am thankful for that.

______________________________

.

A hair in the donut - Edit: Now including explanatory video :-)!

Me? Talking about hair? Well, THAT could become a LONG story, you might think, concerning what length my own hair has :-) ...

Well, yes and no.

It just so happened that, during this morning's breakfast, I was eating a "Berliner" / "Krapfen", or, in English: A German kind of donut; the one without the hole in the middle - the sweetest of explanatory video follows at the end of this entry :-).

And in this donut, there was, apart from the usual filling with some red jam, also

... a hair.

A small souvenir from some unknown employee in the large bakery "Lechbäck" who had been working on the piece of basic yumminess I had chosen to be part of my early morning meal. A little free-of-charge extra, that had, unnoticed, fallen into the doe and, unwillingly, went on a voyage that ended in my mouth.

Yes, I can already sense some of you, in a disgusted and outraged tone, going like "Yuck!", and "Gross!", and "Go and demand your money back!"

Yeah.
You guys ...
No offense, but:

What's the fuzz?

I felt the hair in my mouth, removed it from there (it was only, at the most, one fifth of one of my hairs in length, so d'uh!), put it aside and then continued eating. The donut was as yummy as before, going excellently with the mug of coffee I had made, and I finished my breakfast unharmed.

What started me thinking was that I know quite a bunch of people who would have done nothing of the like!

Either they would have, at the very moment, reproduced the complete contents of their stomach from revulsion, or they would have at least screamed bloody murder, grabbed the receipt of their purchase at the bakery (still close at hand for such a case, of course) and would have made the life of the sales assistant there miserable, although this employee was not responsible for what had happened (= the hair in question not being hers!).


Really ...!


This incident, and the possible reactions it would provoke in those acquaintances of mine, is, in my view, symptomatic for what many of us do so often:

Making their lives miserable in their own account, by overrating the most minuscule of things that may go wrong, and overreacting in a way that you could think their lives are over or they had, at least, to go to war.

The list of those minor incidents that people tend to overreact to is as long as the Nile. And as useless as a leaden cube used for playing football.

There is so much of real importance to deal with ... so ...

Work on your priorities, and on your perspectives, guys.

I mean me, I mean you ... I mean all of us.

(((-: No offense :-)))

______________________________

Okay, and now for the explanation on

WHAT ARE KRAPFEN?

______________________________

.